5. Mirror Mirror

My alarm woke me from a deep sleep. What a strange dream I was having. I resist the urge to hit the snooze button and open my eyes. With a big stretch and a heavy sigh, I slowly head for the washroom. I am unsteady in my steps and there seems to be a pain in my hip that wasn’t there yesterday. As I make my way past the mirror, I take a sideways glance. Who was that woman looking back at me? I recognize myself… yet I don’t. Reluctantly I face my reflection. My dishevelled hair hangs like straw in front of my eyes. Is that a new grey hair I see? Maybe I’ll pick up some dye on the way home from work today. I part my hair to reveal a time worn, pale face. My Hooded eyelids droop over my tired, red eyes. I fixate on the dark circles, resembling that of a Racoon. As I move in closer to the mirror, I begin to notice all the other flaws. The unsightly, red bump that had surfaced, the deep wrinkles, the oily pimples hiding in the crease of my nose, the stained, crooked teeth. Wait a minute… is that a mutant hair on my chin? I looked away with disappointment and disgust. This is going to be a bad day.

Why is it that we obsessively focus on the negatives reflecting back at us? Why can’t we be satisfied with our natural appearance? Perhaps, appropriately enough, we need a little self-reflection.

We are so quick to harshly judge our features and imperfections, and when we don’t like what we see, it takes a huge toll on our health and our happiness.

Learning how to see deeper, beyond our skin, requires a change in attitude.

Try the following exercise each day for a week and you will start to see your thought patterns shifting. This isn’t about giving yourself high-fives in the mirror or blowing kisses at one-self, it is about acknowledging, accepting, and getting to know yourself again.

1. Find a quiet spot and get comfortable in front of a mirror.

2. Close your eyes and relax. When you in a calm state slowly open your eyes and come face-to-face with the image you see in front of you.

3. What is the first thing you see and think? Acknowledge your first impressions and let them drop away.

4. Continue your gaze. Are you saddened by the critical nature of your thoughts? Are you having a hard time holding your gaze? What are your facial expressions telling you; are you angry, sad, disappointed, tired?

5. Continue to observe your feeling and thoughts. Allow them to be there but without judgement. Look at yourself with compassion, understanding and self-love. Notice the beautiful things that make you, you.

6. Finish up with affirmations of kindness.

Most of us look at ourselves in the mirror without really looking. By seeing beyond the physical flaws you can combat the self-criticism with self-compassion.

This, by far, was one of the hardest exercises I have ever done. At first I was very awkward and self conscious. It was difficult to let go of the negativity that was looking back at me; however as each day passed, I became more and more comfortable with the image in the mirror.

Today I looked in the mirror. At first glance I saw my greying hair, red, tired eyes, red bump, wrinkles, pimples and crooked teeth. I looked away. At this moment I had a choice; I could continue to focus on the negatives, or I could treat myself with more acceptance and compassion. I looked at my reflection once again. There is more to me than meets the eye. I am strong, caring, creative and beautiful, mutant hair and all. This is going to be a good day.

Be kind to yourself and thank you for reading “The Weekly Seed.”

Laura